This week, I take a behind-the-scenes look, showing the men of the executive branch in their unguarded moments. As you’ll see, life in the corridors of power isn’t all hard work and agonizing decisions.

Monday, August 20th
-Suffering from short-timer syndrome, Karl Rove boasts that he has now recorded the top five scores on the Big Buck Hunter Pro in the mini-arcade in the Lincoln bedroom. Upon hearing Rove’s boast, Dick Cheney smirks. He joins Rove for a two-player game and his hunter shoots Rove’s in the face.

Tuesday, August 21st
-Cheney: Hey Karl, what do you get when you adopt standards to prevent states from extending the CHIP program to cover more children?
(Rove looks back from game of Golden Tee, shrugs)
Cheney: A boner!

Wednesday, August 22nd
-The Texas Rangers, formerly partially-owned by the President, score 30 runs in a game, the most in the modern era. The President is elated. He receives his weekly call from General Petraeus. “How ’bout them Rangers?” Bush asks, jovially. Petraeus launches into a detailed explanation of special forces operations in the Al-Anbar province. Bush loses interest, passes the phone to Cheney.
-The President delivers a speech defending the American presence in Iraq by likening it to the American presence in Vietnam in the 60s and 70s. Before Bush can finish his assertion that US withdrawal from Vietnam led to the rise of Pol Pot and the Khmer Rouge in Cambodia, Tony Snow has snuck out the back door. He brushes aside aides who remind him of his duties to the President, yelling “Tell him I have cancer!”

Thursday, August 23rd
-Looking for lessons on how to defeat insurgents, win hearts and minds, Bush watches American movies set in the Vietnam War.
-Petraeus, Joint Chiefs reject Bush’s suggested Surge title, “Operation Rambo Drop.”

Friday, August 24th
-Petraeus threatens to quit if asked one more time, “What are we doing about this Jason Bourne?”
-The President, lately a scholar in history, ruins the screen of his laptop when highlighting “1215 - Pope Innocent III declares Magna Carta invalid” on wikipedia “This Day in History” page.

This entry was posted on Friday, August 24th, 2007 at 2:45 am and is filed under This Week in the Bush Administration, Corruption. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.