This Week in the Bush Administration
November 12th, 2007 by Damon
Monday, November 5th
-Pervez Musharraf receives a congratulatory phone call from David Addington.
Tuesday, November 6th
-Dennis Kucinich pushes for a House vote on his articles of impeachment for Dick Cheney. In the office of the Vice President, David Addington hands a bristling Cheney a pledge the latter signed when Chris Dodd put a hold on the FISA immunity bill:

Wednesday, November 7th
-Lynne Cheney speaks about the stories in her memoir, Blue Skies, No Fences, at a Washington D.C. luncheon. An article describing the event in the Stafford County Sun states that “[i]t was a time when the adults did not hesitate to teach values and proper social morés of honesty, hard work, and patriotism.” Explains Cheney: “We were taught never to write anything down. And if you were going to strap someone to a table, cover their mouth with a towel, and pour water on their face, you know, just so they would think they were drowning, you didn’t do it in your hometown. Preferably, you had someone else do it, like Syrians or Uzbekis.”
-She also recounts a period in their courtship when Dick decided he wanted to date other people. Her relatives “circled the wagons,” decking her out in the finest outfits to make Dick jealous. Asked for more details, she says, “I dressed up as a schoolgirl. Even back then, there was no one Dick would rather screw than our nation’s children.”
Friday, November 9th
-Citing an obscure provision of the Patriot Act, Pervez Musharraf has barbed wire and troops placed around the home of opposition leader Benazir Bhutto. Asked his thoughts on the maneuver in an opinion poll, Michael Mukasey is undecided.
Saturday, November 10th
-The Asia Times reports that the National Intelligence Estimate on Iran has been held up for a year by Dick Cheney’s office, which wants one that will better support their aggressive positions toward that country. Now that the NIE will be released, word is that the Administration will attempt to classify large portions. “Right now, we’re on two fronts,” explained a Cheney spokesperson. “If we fail to classify the NIE but succeed in classifying the Constitution, we’ll consider it a victory.”
Sunday, November 11th
-The New York Times reports that the United States can’t account for 190,000 small arms that were shipped to Iraq. President Bush, however, remains confident: “The market will find a solution. The real concern is making sure that the terrorists aren’t receiving arms from Iran.”